Centennial

Good morning, and welcome to my 100th post in the post-hijacker days.

To celebrate this milestone, I would like to share this video with you, and hope you laughed as damn hard as I did!

True colors are beautiful

This post may be rather boring, and if it is, I do apologize. But I found it over at the lovely Madge's blog, and thought it was cute.

COLORS

Red.
1. Closest red thing to you? My raincoat
2. Last thing to make you angry? My mother. She likes to make family reunion plans during the one weekend for which I said I cannot go. Then she guilt trips me about it.
3. Do you have a temper? For certain things, yes. I don’t usually have a temper with people I love, but politics often make my blood boil.
4. Are you a fan of romance? I used to be…I still am sometimes, but not like I was when I was younger. I hope this is just “growing up” and not cynicism.

Orange.
1. Closest orange thing to you? The wind-up giraffe I have on my desk.
2. Do you like to burn things? Actually I am kind of a pyro sometimes. I think fire is pretty.
3. Dress up for Halloween? Yeah, my friends and I usually hit up a Halloween party.
4. Are you usually a warm-hearted person? Yes, I think so. I cry when watching the news sometimes, does that count?
5. Do you have anything against redheaded people? Only that they have red hair and I’m jealous. I love red hair. I was a [chemically-created] red-head for a couple of years, but the up-keep was tough.
6. Are you usually full of energy? Yeah, I’m usually pretty energetic. (That didn't sound very energetic, did it?)

Yellow.
1. Closest yellow thing to you? My fantastic new handbag!
2. The happiest time[s] of your life? When I studied abroad in Ecuador in ’03. I really had the time of my life. So far, anyway. But it’ll be tough to top.
3. Favorite holiday? Christmas.
4. Are you a coward? Not about most things. But approaching a male I find interesting, yes, I’m a coward!!
5. Do you burn or tan? I try not to do either. Sunscreen for everyone!

Green.
1. Closest green thing to you? Highlighter!
2. Do you care about the enviroment? Hello! I’m from OREGON! (Translation = YES!)
3. Are you jealous of anyone right now? My best friend who is heading to Vegas next week. Beotch.
4. Are you a lucky person? No, definitely not.
5. Do you always want what you can't have? No, that’s not an issue I have often.
6. Do you like being outdoors? The outdoors is a wonderful place, isn’t it? I’m especially fond of bridges and waterfalls.
7. Are you Irish? Nope. Dutch and Czech.

Blue.
1. Closest blue thing to you? My post-it notes.
2. Are you good at calming people down? Yeah, I am pretty good at that, actually. Usually I manage to make them laugh.
3. Do you like the sea? Oh yes, I’m a beach girl at heart.
4. What was the last thing that made you cry? I don’t remember….. I think a few weeks ago when I watched Life is Beautiful.
5. Are you a logical thinker? Most of the time.
6. Can you sleep easily? Yes! It’s that beautiful new bed I bought myself.

Purple.
1. Closest purple thing to you? Vase on my desk.
2. Like being treated to expensive things? I like expensive things, but I’m also frugal so I usually don’t give in. And I have this annoying personality trait where I don’t like to let people buy things or do things for me. I’m working on letting that go, though. Sometimes you just need to let people help you out.
3. Do you like mysterious things? Yes, mysteries are always a good time.
4. Favorite type of chocolate? Dark with cayenne pepper.
5. Ever met anyone in royalty? I am royalty.
6. Are you creative? Yes, I am pretty creative! But not artistic. Those are very different things.

Pink.
1. Closest pink thing to you? My undies! -- Me too, Madge!
2. Do you like sweet things? Why yes I do. As a matter of fact, I'm eating some Junior Mints right now!
3. Are you sensitive? Not really.
4. Do you like music? Oh music...how do I love thee?

White
1. Closest white thing to you? My page-a-day calendar.
2. Would you say you're innocent? Um…I’m pleading the fifth on that one.
3. Are you good at keeping the peace? I can usually keep the peace, but I also like a good debate. 4. How do you imagine your wedding? I don’t, really. I often think I’ll do it Vegas-style if I walk down that plank. Then again, a reception would be fun. Plus, my family would kill me if I did it in Vegas.
5. Do you like to play in the snow? I love to play in the snow! Try to drag my butt to work in the snow? Not so much.
6. Are you afraid of going to the doctors or dentist? I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE DENTIST. Doctors are OK.

Black.
1. Closest black thing to you? My shoes
2. Ever enjoy hurting people? Um, no. What kind of question is this?
3. Are you sophisticated or silly? Totally depends on the situation. Out with friends? Silly. In class? Sophisticated.
4. Would you like to go to space? I would love to go to space. I think the stars are fascinating.
5. Do you have a lot of secrets? Only a few---it’s more fun if you only have one or two. Like this blog, for example. No one in the “real world” knows I have it.
6. What is your favorite colour? Red. Also yellow and blue.
7. Does the colour you wear affect your mood? No, but I think perhaps my mood affects the color I wear.

Wine Down on the Coast

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

That was a nice exhale.

I didn’t do a damn productive thing this weekend. I will probably live to regret that seeing as I have a 15 pager due next week that I have yet to start on, but it felt nice to just chill out and party hardy.

The Newport Seafood and Wine Festival was this weekend, and it was a blast! Some friends and I went last year, too—we’ve definitely decided to make it a tradition. The Festival is held in a big tent by the bay with over 100 vendors, 60 of them being wine vendors.

It’s the best place to get your wine on.

I of course hit my favorite, Hood River Vineyards, and found a new one, Honeywood Winery. Hood River Vineyards has the usual pinots and rieslings, but they also specialize in these fantastic fruit-based wines, including Marionberry, Black Cherry, and Raspberry wines. They are definitely dessert wines, so you need to be a fan of sweet wines to enjoy them, but they are fantastic.






Keeping with tradition of fruit wines, I found a new love in the Loganberry Wine made by Honeywood Winery. I must have a bottle (or five) right now. It has this lovely fruit flavor, with a deep color, and is the most perfect balance of sweet and tart I have ever had in a wine. It would be excellent with dark chocolate, I think.





Other favorites:
Hip Chicks Do Wine
Wine by Joe
Willamette Valley Vineyards
David Hill Winery (this one is right by where I went to college)
Oak Knoll Winery (their "Grape Eruption" wine is fantastic)

As was expected, I drank way too much wine. I will not admit to the number of glasses, but we’ll just say it was more than 3 but less than 10. Needless to say, my friends and I were in a happy place. We also managed to get adorned with quite a few Mardi Gras beads…I’m not really sure why.





And in a fantastic twist of fate, I randomly ran into this guy I studied abroad with in Ecuador back in ’03! I hadn’t seen him since we got off the plane when we got back to the states, so it was great to see him. He was pretty lit, but I told him to bring his friends and meet us at the pub that night after the festival, which he did. It was nice to “catch up,” but he was quite wasted so I’m willing to bet he doesn’t remember half the conversation. He must have asked for my phone number a half a dozen times after I gave it to him. He fiancée was being a sport, though. Most girls would have been horrified by his inebriated state, but she was having fun with him. Hopefully we’ll meet up soon and have a real catch-up session.

So I probably drank too much, and should have gotten some homework done, but I’m oh so glad I didn’t. This weekend probably ranks as one of the best I’ve had in a while!

Cheers!

She will purr while gouging your eyes out.

So Jane decided it would be a good idea to catch a parasite. I really have no idea how she managed this, seeing that she is an indoor cat. I will admit it freaks me out slightly. Well, in a perfect world, one would simply go to any store, buy some wormer medicine, and administer it to the cat. Voila! Problem solved.

Well, Jane doesn’t work that way. I tried a liquid, I tried a paste, and I tried a powder. The little punk would not take her medicine. Finally, I had to give up and take her to the vet.

Jane does not like the vet. She has notes in her chart warning vet techs and doctors about her behavior. I do not like taking her to the vet. It’s embarrassing.

This trip was no different. Because they just needed to pop a pill in her mouth, I didn’t have to see a doctor, just a tech in the back room. They even have this little plunger thing that is supposed to make administering the pill very simple:


No comments from the peanut gallery---yes, I know what that looks like.

Pill Number One: Plunger goes pop, Jane bites down, spits out the pieces and smacks the vet tech’s hand away. Very loud guttural sounds begin. Two vet techs hold her down. Other techs and doctors in the back room start gathering around to watch the spectacle.

Pill Number Two: Plunger goes pop three times, Jane gags up the pill and spits it out every time. Bends one of the tech’s fingernails back. Tech fights off tears. They get a towel to wrap her little weapons paws up. Jane hisses and spits and bitches and moans.

Now they figure it’s time to give up and just give her a shot. This also pisses Jane off, but they manage to get it in her and then toss her back in her carrier. A should-have-been a $5 trip turns into a $33 trip.

My cat is a Ninja.

Splendiferous

Man, they’ve been making me work lately. What up with that?

How are you doing today? Anything new?

My weekend was OK—I had class, so that took up a lot of it. BUT, it’s my advocacy class and we’re doing a mock arbitration hearing, and I get to be the arbitrator! So I get to pass judgement and all that fun stuff. That’s not until next month, though.

Actually, after class I met some friends for dinner at Autentica, which has fantastically orgasmic authentic Mexican food. Oh, it was so deliciosa. And even though we were stuffed to the gills we decided that dessert was in order at Pix Patisserie. Yum!

So Saturday I may have been in class, but I made good use of Saturday night.

Last night, instead of doing homework, I did a little shopping (Hello, take-advantage-of-dead-presidents-day sales!). I came away with some great deals! Then we hit one of my all-time favorite restaurants in Portland---The Montage.

Oooh, heavenly. I had my usual favorite, alligator linguini (did she just say alligator? Why yes, I think she did). It is oh so good. It just has the best atmosphere for a restaurant. First of all, it’s in this totally seedy area under the Morrison Bridge. It’s all dark and fantastic inside and it’s a bunch of long tables so you might end up sitting with people you don’t know. It’s great! OK, I just read that again and it doesn’t sound that fantastic, but I promise, it is! And when you have leftovers they put them in a fun tinfoil to-go animal or flower or something. My friend and I both had leftovers, and our person made us a cat and a mouse to go!

OK, all this talk of food has made me hungry!

In other news, I think I forgot to update that that guy in my class that I wanted to introduce to my friend already has a girlfriend, so that’s a no go. But I’ll keep you updated on any new developments.

In even other news, this kid just kills me. I went to high school with him, and he is the most brilliant, fascinating guy I’ve ever met. He’s even nice to boot! In high school he built a freakin Tesla Coil, so I’m not too surprised to see he’s winning $30K prizes for amazing inventions and succeeding like mad at MIT. Nathan Ball, you rock!

Also, I think this is fascinating. And I don't believe for second that it has nothing to do with the fact that Iraq has become a disaster. How long before the crazies go all “Freedom Fries” on the UK? So instead of English Breakfast Tea it’ll be American Breakfast Tea? Or English Muffins are now American Muffins? Can’t wait. Nice job, Blair—it’s about time you stopped being a lapdog.

And you know...it's been a while........ I want these shoes:

I ain't just whistlin' dixie

Items of note for Friday—

I was perusing Flickr this morning (I can’t remember why, there was a reason) when I came upon this photograph.

Isn’t that just stunning?? So beautiful. Taken by sduffy (who I don’t know, but is now my personal hero).

In other news, I ordered some “business cards” this morning. I don’t have actual business cards, and when I make public service connections, I want something to hand out that has my contact info on them. So I went to Moo and ordered 100 cards with the following photos on the back:

Pretty, huh? Maybe some day I’ll actually have real business cards!


Finally, if you need something to do, please go visit my new favorite site, which had me in stitches all afternoon. Definitely one to add to the sidebar!

One of my favorites for the day:

4PM Too-Much-Information Technology

Coworker: Thank you for calling ABC Tech Support*.

Can I have your name, please?

... While we're waiting for the information to come up in our system,

you wouldn't happen to know how they execute their criminals in China...?

I just ask because I heard that they sell the organs of condemned

criminals over there..

Houston, Texas

Overheard by: Glad I wasn't on the phone at the time


Have a fantastic weekend!

Be Mine

Happy Valentine's Day!

Peachy Keen

1. I’m pretty excited that we’ve already got a good pool of presidential candidates. This time last year I was very worried that we didn’t have anybody! Too soon to call who’s going to get the nod, but it should be an interesting race. If those elephants hold on to power, though, someone’s going to have some serious explaining to do.

He’s such a handsome fellow. And I would just like to state for the record that I liked him before he became Mr. Popular.

2. I was lecturing my cat last night about being a stubborn ass. She somehow has worms (gross!!) and she’s being difficult and won’t take her medicine. I keep telling her that if she doesn’t cooperate we’re going to have to go to the VET which she HATES. They’re scared of her, too. She’s even got a note in her file saying she’s a little shit difficult cat and needs several vet assistants present.

She’s such a cute little thing, though.

3. I have terrible taste in movies. I can watch just about anything and find some entertainment value. I feel sorry for those people who only watch movies to get some deeper meaning out of a film—they miss out on good laughs and brainless humor! My friend and I went and saw Because I Said So (chick flick!). We usually go out to dinner on Valentine’s Day but I have class on Wednesday so this was like our V-Day date. She’s mad I’m ditching her so she has already picked out the bottle of wine she will drink herself on Wednesday.

But the movie was pretty cute. And one the guys in it is scorchin! I mean, it’s a “romantic comedy” which of course always has the same plot “boy likes girl, boy dates girl, they break up for some reason, girl wants boy back, boy says no, eventually changes his mind, happily ever after.” But that’s why we watch them, isn’t it?

4. I had a follow-up doctor’s appointment today. Things are still healing well after the surgery, but he can tell that there’s some serious inflammation up there. This means I am very allergic to something, but because they’ve already tested me for everything they can test for, there’s no way to really know what it is out there. This annoys me greatly. So now I’m on a nasal steroid that I have to take twice a day, but it should help with the ridiculous sneezing and such. Eventually I’ll probably be able to get off the spray once I’m away from the allergen – which I really think is my job.

Time to sharpen that resume.


So. How was your weekend?

Is our children learning?

On this fine Friday, I would just like to say, Happy Weekend to all!

I would also like to share this video:



I can’t decide if it’s funny or horrifying.

Or a little of both.

How embarrassing.

It's going to start raining again

Items of note on this Wednesday:

~ I am so in love with the bed I bought, but it makes it very difficult to get my rear in gear in the mornings. I mean, if you were sleeping on clouds, would you want to get up?

~ I have successfully made Zuppa Toscana soup at home, and it tastes every bit as fabulous as it does at the Olive Garden.

~ I absolutely cannot stand Country Crock commercials. I don’t know what it is about them, but they drive me completely crazy. The cheesiness factor is too overwhelming, I hate their “let’s not show the actors’ faces” thing they have going on, and the voice-overs make me want to gag. And the chick sounds like maybe she was once a man.



~ I am currently reading Mountains Beyond Mountains for a class, and it is really excellent. Have any of you read it? The sub-title for the book is The Quest of Dr. Paul Farmer, a Man Who Would Cure the World. I mean, that alone tells you you’re in for something crazy. I’m only 1/3 of the way through, and it’s already making me feel bad about myself because of all the incredible things this man did by my age. That’s not the point of the book, of course, but it’s really good. Go read it.

~ I’ve decided that this guy in my class would really hit it off with my best friend. I don’t know the guy very well, though, so I’m not really sure how to approach it. Should I just say “OK, I know this sounds weird but I think you’d really like my friend?” I suppose it’s worth a shot. Any suggestions on how to go about this? Usually when I hook people up I know both of them well so I can organize a group outing.

~ Why do some people have common sense while others have none at all? For example: A few weeks ago, we had a staff meeting that happened to fall on a coworker’s birthday, so we had cake at our meeting. Someone brought the extra cake and the knife used to cut it to the back room so people could graze the leftovers. When the cake was done and gone, however, whoever put the knife away did not bother to wash it. We wanted to use it today and it was covered in crusty old chocolate from weeks ago. I mean, hello!

~ And what would a Junniper post be without a statement of some item that I bought that I didn’t need nor can really afford?? But it was so pretty:

I mean, it has polka dots on the inside lining! Now Spring needs to get here so I can wear it.

~ Funny video for the day:




~ That’s all.

Portland Pride Barbie!

My friend sent me an email with the new Portland-area-inspired Barbies, and I must admit I laughed my ass off. Now, with the exception of Madge, and maybe Tristan or Matt depending on how well they know Portland, this will probably go over your head.

Although really----they could work for any city, couldn't they?

I must admit I'm a little upset that there is no North Portland Barbie or St. John's Barbie. Hmph.





Vancouver Barbie
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.





Hawthorne Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Midtown Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.




Lake Oswego Barbie
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of Rolls Royce convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.





Beaverton Barbie
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.




Stark Street Barbie
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.





Clackamas Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) ..unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.




West Hills Barbie
She's perfect in every way. We don't know where Ken is because he's always out a-'huntin'.




Pearl District Barbie
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available as well as warehouse conversion condo.




Forest Heights Barbie
This princess Barbie is sold only at The Galleria. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade, Prada and LV Handbags, Rolex watch a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a 25,000 sq ft. patio home. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.




Estacada Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.




Gresham, Hillsboro, and other suburbs Barbie
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Butler Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top Also available with a mobile home.

Yowza

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows comes out July 21st.

Yikes!

And in a very illustrative example of my prime nerdiness I was immediately disappointed because my friend's wedding is that day so I will not be able to march out and buy it and proceed to read the whole thing over the weekend without leaving my apartment lest the climactic ending of the book be uttered in my presence before I have read it.

*ahem*

ANYWAY, the world is a little less funnier today, and a little less liberal. Molly Ivins has lost her battle with breast cancer.





I met this woman in 2002, and she was a firecracker.

::::::

This video makes me laugh every time I watch it:


You kinda gotta give the guy some credit...at least the sleaze has a sense of humor.

::::::

And I'm going to apply to participate in the National Education for Women's Leadership program in Oregon this summer. It's a six-day extensive program to introduce women to leadership opportunities, so I'm really excited about it. It's not guaranteed that you'll get in, though, so I do have to take that into account. They don't accept everyone, it's pretty competetive. So keep your fingers crossed for me! :)

MUAH!